On January 11th I had a post on my instagram sharing something very personal. I went back and forth of even posting about it. I had so many direct messages from other people that related to me so I decided to share on our blog.
Over the last couple months I haven’t felt like myself. I’ve been feeling unattractive and uncomfortable in my own skin. The feeling doesn’t consistently remain. Sometimes it can be for hours or even a couple days. It is a deep low that makes me not want to do anything or be around anyone. I will fixate on my insecurities and just feel really bad about myself. It could be negative self-talk, comparing myself to others or starting to think about all my previous mistakes in life. It can become a very dark place and especially during a pandemic. These moments were happening more frequently. I am happy to share I am not feeling like that today but that doesn’t mean it won’t happen again. What I have learned is that I am not alone and others go through this too. I also wanted to share that writing your feelings down, doing some movement in your body, talking to a friend, playing some good music or crying can be a release for you. 2020 was rough and basically 2021 is just 2020 with a new wig AND we will get through it too! It is okay to not be okay.
P.S. One thing that helps me is taking a very long hot shower. After my shower I use all my smell good oils, creams and lotions. I moisturize my whole body from my head to my toes. I then put on a clean hoodie and sweatpants set and do my makeup. I take a couple selfies and post some on IG. That makes me happy. Something this small can make my day better.
-Aasha